I don't think I've ever left a theater angry in my entire life. Disappointed? Sure. Frustrated? Absolutely. Bored out of my skull? Just last week! But never actually ANGRY with the film I just saw.

That changed tonight. After stumbling out of a midnight screening of Airbender, I couldn't even believe what I had just seen. This movie (if one could even call it that) fails on every possible level.

As a film? Awful.

As a 3D film? I will never see a post-converted 3D movie again. EVER.

And as an adaptation? It fails so spectacularly that there is a crater left in its wake.

I loved the animated series deeply. I felt connected to the characters, the plot, and the story. It was well-written, wonderfully conceived, and beautifully executed. Shyamalan has taken one of the best animated series I have seen and destroyed it. He tore it to shreds, set it on fire, and then urinated on its smoldering corpse.

While many movies have an actor or two that was miscast, for Airbender it is easier to mention which actors HAVEN'T been miscast, and off the top of my head I can't think of any. It seriously concerns me that Shyamalan, who did such great work with Sixth Sense and a good job with Unbreakable and even Signs (which was about 3/4 of a great movie), could continue to worsen after the abortion that was The Happening, and yet here we are. I wonder if he has some kind of tumor growing in his head that is sapping whatever creative spark he once had, leeching his inventiveness and abilities into a dark hole in his mind. What happened to him? I used to say, despite the fact that his writing has gotten more meandering and horrid over the years, that he was still a fine director (ignoring The Happening). But no more. He has lost even that skill.

Character names were mispronounced from the series for inexplicable reasons (Ahng instead of Aang, SO-kah instead of SOK-kah), ages were rearranged for no particular purpose, and every single one of the child actors annoyed the living crap out of me. He gave little to no time for the characters to breathe, rushing them from one locale to the next in some mad attempt to pack the entirety of the first season of the show into a two-hour film, and he failed miserably.

Narration, which should be used rarely if ever (and even then only to add to the depth of the story), was instead used to fill in gaps of knowledge in the plot. Whole sections that were some of my favorite parts of the show were excised in favor of one poorly-written scene after another.

And as for Mr. Shyamalan: You should be ashamed with what you've done here. The absolute worst part of it was what you did to the fans, and I don't just mean me. At the screening there were perhaps a dozen people dressed as characters from the series, and they were so animated and bubbly by the time the lights went down that I knew we had the perfect audience. When the titles came up, they cheered and applauded with such enthusiasm that I couldn't help but smile. Then the movie actually got going, and as it went on the crowd became quieter and quieter, until eventually there was nothing left but silence, and that was only about 20 minutes in.

The disappointment, the utter and complete hopelessness that I saw on their faces as they left was the worst part. They were children, ostensibly the audience this film was made for, and you ruined it for them.

I am ashamed of you, and if you never make another movie again, it will be too soon.

Anyone notice how IRC user "Fuzz" (Shawn) looks like Shamalawnlawn? I miss that guy.

Thanks for letting us know, kisa.

And as for the director - actually I like him, but I call him Shamalamalan.